[2020-10-26] Buzz cut
Today, my husband gave me a buzz cut. I didn't have the courage to do it myself—not because I was afraid of how it would look, but because I was afraid of cutting myself or not being able to do it well.
With tears in his eyes, Chris kissed me, told me how much he loved me, and got to work. His reluctance has always stemmed from fear of how I would react when I saw myself without hair.
When he was finished, he said, "Look at me," then declared—with some surprise—"It looks good."
I went to the powder room and looked in the mirror. "I love it," I exclaimed. "You did such a great job," I told him.
"What's going on?" my son said, as he descended from his bedroom office. "Whoa, looks good, Mom," he said when he saw me.
My daughter emerged from her basement office and agreed. "It looks so much better than your thinning long hair," she confirmed.
I know that I will continue to lose even the short hairs on my head until I'm completely bald, but that's so much better than pulling handfuls of long thin hair from my scalp at the mere touch of my head. And it's infinitely better than showers with a hairy bear.
Besides, now I know that my head has a lovely, smooth shape.
I donned one of the bamboo beanies my daughter and niece bought for me because my head felt cool without any hair on it. I am happier without hair.
Today, I came across a quote inspired by a cancer patient: "Lose hair, but don't lose hope." That's an apt description of how I feel today.
