[2021-03-12] Officers don't run
Years ago, a colleague told me about a couple of retired military officers with whom he had worked early in his career. My colleague said that he marveled at the calmness of these men, which was so different from his own frenetic nature. He asked them how they could be so calm. One of the retired officers explained: "Officers don't run—it makes the troops nervous."
That story led to a conversation about qualities we admire in our leaders, especially the ability to manage stress and not pass it on to staff.
Retired general and former US Secretary of State Colin Powell had a similar attitude. In his autobiography, It Worked for Me: In Life and Leadership, he shared 13 lessons, one of which was "Remain calm. Be kind." Powell wrote: "In the 'heat of battle'—whether military or corporate—kindness, like calmness, reassures followers and holds their confidence."
I recalled these stories when speaking with my daughter last night. She mentioned that she never worried about my ovarian cancer because of the way I approached it. From her perspective, I remained calm, pragmatic and positive throughout my treatment, and celebrated little victories along the way.
Perhaps this approach came from years of striving to remain calm in the midst of crises of varying magnitude in the workplace. Or perhaps it's simply reflective of my personality. I believe it's the latter, as I've always tried to be even-keeled.
Last July, when I told my son about my diagnosis of ovarian cancer, he asked me, "Are you worried?" "No," I said, even though I was still reeling from the unexpected news that I had received just a few hours before. I wasn't as sure then as I am now, but I'm convinced that it was the right thing to say in the moment. In the back of my mind, I might have said to myself, "Moms don't run—it makes the kids nervous."
