[2021-06-22] Cancer coaching #3
Have you ever started to eat and realized only in that moment how hungry you actually were? This happens to me when I'm busy. I lose track of my appetite and recognize my hunger only when I stop to eat.
That's a bit how coaching has worked for me. I don't register how much something is weighing on my mind until my cancer coach says, "Is there anything in particular you want to discuss today?"
I'll say, "No, not really." And then, "Well, there is this one thing that I've been thinking about." Twenty minutes later, we've covered the gamut of that subject, and I leave the conversation with concrete ideas about next steps I want to take.
What struck me most today is how valuable it is to talk with someone who specializes in supporting people with cancer. My coach has helped me to understand the repercussions of cancer on both our bodies and our minds. Recovering from cancer is not like recovering from another health ailment.
Today, we returned to two subjects discussed in previous sessions: reducing my high risk of breast cancer and investigating whether my gallbladder is the source of my abdominal discomfort.
First, I recapped my conversation with Dr. Cordeiro, a Breast Surgical Oncologist at The Ottawa Hospital, regarding a possible preventive bilateral mastectomy. I shared with my coach that I was still feeling positive several weeks after the dialogue with Dr. Cordeiro, and confident in the information the doctor had provided and the next steps she had identified. I also thanked my coach for helping me to prepare for the conversation with Dr. Cordeiro by validating the questions I had thought of and suggesting a few I hadn't considered.
Second, I updated my coach on steps I had taken to address a health issue I talked about during my last session, namely, abdominal discomfort that I believe to be related to my gallbladder. In addition to starting a diet low in saturated fats, I connected with my doctor to request an ultrasound.
As I explained to my coach, once I raise an issue with her, I'm more likely to take steps to address the concern, in part so that I can report back at our next call. To me, a commitment to a coach is like a commitment to a teacher. Just as I wouldn't want to disappoint a teacher by not doing my homework, I wouldn't want to disappoint my coach by not following through on a commitment to pursuing a problem. In truth, my coach wouldn't be disappointed; as she said today, coaches are very understanding. In reality, I would be disappointed in myself, as I like to live up to my promises.
Before getting a cancer coach through the Ottawa Regional Cancer Foundation, I wasn't sure that I needed one. I had assumed that I would seek a coach if I were really struggling. But as my coach said at our first session, sometimes, coaching is about giving coachees an opportunity to hear their own voice. After three sessions, I've come to realize that coaches can help with all sorts of issues, including the ones we didn't know we had until we started talking.
