[2021-11-20] Fuss-free entertaining
With the upcoming holidays and the gradual return to larger gatherings of friends and family, tonight's post offers 10 tips for fuss-free entertaining. I was inspired to write this post after reading an article today on the pressure we sometimes put on ourselves to be perfect in the kitchen—something many of us can no doubt relate to.
In her article Working in Food Made Me Worse at Entertaining, Kelly Vaughn reveals that being a cook in a French restaurant—where "anything less than perfect was unacceptable"—led her to believe that she needed to serve flawless food to others. As a result, every time she cooked for her family or friends, she felt compelled to prepare an elaborate feast, thinking that they expected it.
She recounts a story from two years ago when she planned a Thanksgiving dinner for friends. Working for Martha Stewart at the time, following her stint at the French restaurant, she felt obligated to prepare extravagant, made-from-scratch dishes. So she planned a multi-course dinner for four, consisting of homemade fig and almond crackers, citrus-roasted turkey, cornbread dressing, cranberry sauce, corn casserole, brown sugar and bacon-glazed Brussels sprouts, roasted carrots, buttermilk biscuits, and two desserts: apple pandowdy and a chocolate-espresso mousse pie. When her friends arrived earlier than expected, she was torn between preparing her fancy fare and entertaining her friends. The fancy fare won out.
Looking back on this experience, she realized: "when you get too focused on making everything just so, it makes less fun for you and for your guests." Guests don't want perfection from their hosts, she conceded; "They just want good company and a decent meal."
Ain't that the truth?
Here's what I've learned over the past 40 years of cooking and baking for my family and others:
- Choose one signature dish. Like Vaughn, I used to make three or four complicated dishes for one dinner party, often choosing new recipes. This created more hassle than it was worth. I learned to focus my efforts on one special dish and to choose accompaniments that were tried and true.
- Make some things in advance. I picked up this old entertainer's trick by reading a lot of cookbooks and cooking magazines in my teens, and it is still a good idea. Putting a dish in your slow cooker offers many advantages: the food can be prepared in advance and kept warm, and it can be served from its own crock pot.
- Get others involved. Enlist your housemates in preparing the feast for guests. Put each person in charge of one dish, such as an appetizer, side, main course or dessert. My kids and I did this for Thanksgiving 2020, and I found it wonderful to eat something prepared by someone else.
- Stick to dishes you know well. Trying a new recipe on guests can be tricky. It always takes me more time to prepare a dish the first time than on subsequent attempts. And I often discover ways to tweak a good recipe after a few tries. Making traditional dishes can alleviate a lot of stress. One of my husband's favourites is the tourtière of the Saguenay-Lac-St-Jean region of Quebec—cubes of meat, potatoes and onion in a light broth, nestled between thick layers of pie crust, baked in a deep dish.
- Opt for simple, healthy sides with a rich main course, or vice versa. It's easy to get carried away with special sauces and marinades for every item on the menu, making each dish a rich helping of fat, salt and sometimes sugar. The richer my main course, the leaner my sides (which also saves me time and energy since these leaner dishes are often much easier to make). On the other hand, if I serve lean meat, such as turkey, I can splurge on a side dish, such as cheesy scalloped potatoes.
- Avoid the dessert smorgasbord. I read years ago that if you offer multiple desserts at a dinner party, guests will want to try all of them. (I always do.) This can quickly lead to overeating at the end of a big meal. While it's lovely to offer a few desserts, particularly if accounting for food allergies and preferences among your guests, it isn't necessary to offer a buffet of cakes, pies and desserts.
- Enlist the help of your guests. I've never had a dinner party during which a guest has not offered to help. Saying yes to help not only takes the pressure off you, but it also gives you some quality time with one or more people at your party.
- Supplement your cooking with choices from a local shop. Feel free to purchase one or more elements of your dinner spread from a local shop, particularly if they make something that you can't easily replicate.
- Have a potluck. While making every dish comes with certain bragging rights, the potluck offers distinct advantages: less time commitment on the part of the host, an amazing array of foods, a least one dish that every guest likes, the chance to try a new dish (and thus find a new favourite recipe), and praise all around.
- Enjoy yourself. Don't get so caught up in trying to make the experience perfect for your guests that you don't enjoy the food yourself. Your guests can wait a few minutes between the main course and dessert if you're still enjoying your meal.
If you will be hosting a dinner party this holiday season, consider applying one or more of these tips. And if you have the pleasure of being invited to a dinner party, take something along; whether you make it or buy it, your host will be grateful.
