[2022-07-10] Amazing
A friend who started a new job this week wrote to me today to share his joys and his fears. On the latter, he wrote:
My fear is about being able to add value to the team. This new team is a well-oiled machine. I have to work hard to make them feel that I am truly the right fit for the position. I really want to bring at least one new thing that is useful to the business.
When we take on a new role, many of us want to make our mark, demonstrate our value, justify our getting the job. That's laudable, and often what our bosses are seeking. However, I doubt that it's what our employees are looking for.
Whenever I got a new boss, I hoped for someone who would be human, empathic and kind. Someone who would trust and respect me by default. Someone who would be curious about what was already working while being open to my ideas for improvement. Someone who would learn my name and take the time to get to know me as a person and not just a worker. Someone who would ask questions and listen to the answers. Someone who would help me grow and develop. Someone who would provide feedback in a way that made me want to work harder and go further than I had done before. Someone who would value me and be committed to removing barriers standing in the way of my doing my best work. Someone who would make me feel safe.
My friend's fears reminded me of a quote I read recently on the @mypositiveoutlooks Instagram account:
Some of you are unaware of just how amazing you really are. The way you make people laugh, lift others up, or spread some extra love. You do this even though you are struggling too, and I think it makes you such a beautiful human being.
I hope my friend realizes just how amazing he is. From my perspective—as both a friend and a former boss—he is positive, uplifting, respectful, humble, intellectual without being pretentious, open to feedback, caring and curious.
Since I started this blog, my friend has been writing to me at least weekly, reflecting on my posts over the previous seven days, sharing stories from his own life that parallel mine, and offering sage insights about life's ups and downs, opportunities and challenges, joys and fears.
If he brings the same compassion to his new team that he has brought to me over the past two years, he will have no trouble helping them to see that he is the right fit for the position.
