[2022-10-10] Cancer and mental health
A few days ago, I read an interesting article called Laughing in the face of cancer: Conquering a dark diagnosis with even darker humour. It reminded me that everyone's experience with cancer is different:
- Some people feel angry, lonely and helpless. Others find meaning in the challenge and a new outlook on life. No doubt, most feel scared.
- Some people seek out support from family and friends. Others withdraw. Many may experience a dwindling of support as their journey continues.
- Some people share their story publicly. Others keep their diagnosis and treatment private. Many tell their loved ones, but likely few express how they truly feel.
Whatever approach one takes, there's no right way to cope with the disease.
Chelsey Gomez, who was diagnosed with Hodgkin lymphoma at 28, didn't feel like a cancer warrior. She didn't feel brave, strong or inspirational. Having cancer didn't lead to a major epiphany or a renewed zest for life. When her cancer returned just three months after she had completed treatment, Gomez commented: "I wasn’t a warrior with a sword battling a dragon. I was just a girl hooked up to an IV pole trying not to die." To cope with the complex and unexpected emotions she was experiencing, the mother of a toddler turned to digital art, posting her creations on Instagram using the handle @ohyouresotough. Gomez said: "I decided to start drawing how I really felt about cancer versus the way that everyone told me I should feel." An example of her dark humour: "Cancer muggles be like: 'If you have cancer, why aren't you bald?'"
Similarly, the creator behind the Instagram account @thecancerpatient used social media to find a supportive community. Having moved from the Philippines to the United States a year before being diagnosed with cancer, they found the online support they received during treatment huge. "When I was going through treatment—having no physical support system around me—I was withdrawn, and I wasn’t myself," they said. Sharing their experience with cancer helped normalize complicated emotions and vulnerability. While they acknowledged that positivity has its place, they stated that "voicing how you really feel [is] healthy, human and natural." They added: "Cancer is very unpredictable and the doctors, the surgery, the chemo, the radiation, it may cure the cancer, but it doesn’t heal your soul. Humour, community and connection with other people who have been through it before, that’s what actually heals you."
I have benefited from the healing that comes from humour, community and connection with other people—both those who have had cancer and those who have not. As I've shared my story, so many people have shared theirs with me. Together, we've laughed, commiserated and connected. I've also been well served by writing this blog. Reflecting on the sad, scary, uncertain aspects of cancer has enabled me to acknowledge these emotions and let them go. Celebrating each little victory has made me appreciate all the good in my life. And talking about things that have nothing to do with cancer and everything to do with living a grateful life has helped me to live in the moment.
I feel lucky that my cancer treatments appear to have had no long-term ill effects on my physical or mental health. My relationships with family, friends, colleagues and Jenesis readers aplenty have nurtured my mental health while the medical community primarily took care of my physical health. On this World Mental Health Day, I am grateful for the support of so many people.
