[2022-11-28] Freedom to choose
A friend asked me to share how I schedule my day now compared to before I retired.
The biggest difference is the freedom to choose what I do in most moments.
When I worked at a job, especially my final position as an assistant deputy minister, my day was largely determined for me. I spent about one third of my day in meetings scheduled by other people, one third in meetings I organized (primarily to receive briefings from staff and to provide them with direction) and one third reviewing and approving communications documents. It was rare that I could do what I wanted to do at any given moment. Instead, I did the tasks of my job in the order they were required. For example, every night, I would sit down in my home office (aka at my dining room table) and plow through my homework, which my dedicated executive assistant would list in a table in order of priority. My entire job was about doing what I needed to do when I needed to do it.
When I stepped away from my job to deal with ovarian cancer, my calendar continued to be scheduled for me, largely by the demands of my treatment. When I wasn't in appointments or treatment, though, I could do what I wanted to do, at least within the limits of what my body would allow. When recovering from surgery, chemotherapy or radiation, my pastimes were mainly sedentary: reading, writing, watching movies or shows. When I felt better, I baked, visited with friends and family, and went for walks.
Now that I am post cancer treatment and firmly in retirement, I can—for the most part—do what I want to do when I want to do it. I cook, clean, organize, bake, go for walks, and do projects as the mood strikes me. I do have some time-bound habits—activities that are repeated at a specific time each day. For example, on weekdays, I get up at the same time as my daughter so that we can eat breakfast together. I do dishes after each meal, so that I can return the kitchen to its rightful order. I learn Portuguese in the morning and the evening because Duolingo gives me double points if I choose those times of the day to practise. I try to be home by noon so that I can have lunch with Chris and Mel (on days she doesn't go to the office) and so that I can go for a walk with her after we eat. Chris and I aim to have supper on the table between 5:00 and 5:30 PM, and we watch Jeopardy together every weeknight at 7:30. Because these scheduled activities are enjoyable (even doing the dishes), they feel less like demands and more like healthy habits.
Aside from those regularly scheduled activities, I get to pick the what and the when of everything else I do. And it's that freedom that I cherish the most, especially after having worked so many years in fairly regimented roles. Having control over my day makes me happy. It allows me to switch activities at the drop of a hat, which makes it possible for me to respond to the needs of family members and friends.
Two things haven't changed since retirement. The first is that I'm always doing something, striving to put my time to productive use. The second is that I always have more I would like to accomplish than hours in the day. It's just that, in retirement, it's easier to say, "Tomorrow is another day."
