[2023-01-13] Win-win networking
I recently came across this quote on networking by Earl G. Graves:
What makes networking work is that it sets up win-win situations in which all parties involved get to take something home. Networking is a sharing process. Until you understand that, you won't make much of a network.
I shared similar advice in my August 2021 post on Networking:
See networking as an ongoing activity, not something that you do just when you're looking to get something. View networking as an opportunity to give. Giving could include helping someone by sharing a talent you have or passing along a resource that the other person would find helpful.
Both Graves' quote and my advice could apply not only to networking but to mentoring and coaching as well. Many people see such career-based relationships as a way to get something, such as advice, connections and jobs. Fewer people recognize that giving to someone with whom they have a networking, mentoring or coaching relationship is not only a professional thing to do but ultimately the best way to achieve an ongoing association.
It's like Boy Scout Apple Day. Some troops sell the apples to raise funds, others give them to people who make a donation, and some offer them to anyone who is passing by, in the hopes that the gift will motivate the recipient to make a donation. This final model is the one I encountered a few years ago outside a local grocery store. Being offered an apple got my attention more than simply being asked for a donation.
Taking a page from the Boy Scouts, people looking to network with others or to find a coach or mentor could consider what they have to give as they contemplate what they want to get.
Now, before you say to yourself, "What do I have to offer?" consider this: you probably have skills, knowledge, time, interests and resources that someone else does not have. You may have more time to research a subject you're passionate about than the person you wish to connect with. You may have a skill (such as a technical ability) that a potential mentor does not. You may have recent education that a possible coach would find valuable.
While you may have less experience than the person you wish to connect with, you may have more experience than someone they're already mentoring. You could offer to spend time with one of their protégés as a way of paying forward the help they may give you.
To borrow an analogy from Margaret Fuller, who said, "If you have knowledge, let others light their candles in it," you have a candle just like everyone else. Perhaps your candle—what you have to offer—isn't as big as that of the person you are trying to network with, but you do have something to give. Make your relationship win-win.
