[2023-09-07] Beauty and joy in daily rituals
After my daughter had finished work for the day but had not yet emerged from her home office, I texted this question to her:
— Should I make something new for us for dessert?
— Sure, you could make a new dessert.
— Cookies would be fast and easy. And we could bake just a few now and put the rest in the freezer to bake on another day.
— Sure. Are you ok with using the oven today? It's still pretty hot out.
— Well, it's cooler than it's been. But you make a good point.
— Oh, that's true.
— If I have enough graham crumbs, I could make Unbaked Chocolate Squares.
And so we met in the kitchen and made Unbaked Chocolate Squares—an old recipe from our family collection that we don't make very often. But today's lingering heat made it the perfect occasion to make a dessert that didn't require turning on the oven. And collaborating on the endeavour made it so much more enjoyable: a pleasant mother-daughter activity rather than a task to dispense with as quickly as possible.
In his newsletter today, James Clear shared this idea, the final paragraph of which summed up our dessert-making experience:
Many people view their habits and routines as obstacles or, at the very least, obligations to get through. Making the morning coffee, driving your kids to the next activity, preparing the next meal—we often see our routines as chores to be completed.
But these are not moments to be dismissed. They are life. Making coffee can be a peaceful ritual—perhaps even a fulfilling one—if done with care rather than rushed to completion. It’s about the amount of attention you devote to these simple moments, and whether you choose to appreciate them or bulldoze through them on the way to the next task.
Find the beauty and joy in your daily rituals and you will find beauty and joy in your daily life. To love your habits is to love your days, and to love your days is to love your life.
I love my rituals of going for walks with Chris and/or Mel, doing my twice-daily Duolingo practice, playing The New York Times' Connection, Wordle and Mini-Crossword puzzles at breakfast with Mel and Jeopardy at supper with Chris and Mel, adding to my list of things to drop off at Shane's "in the next shipment," hearing what my mom has been up to on our daily phone calls. Though these habits may seem ordinary, they add up to extraordinary days, and a marvelous life.
