I recently stumbled upon the Australian podcast The Imperfects, hosted by brothers Hugh and Josh van Cuylenburg and Ryan Shelton. Hugh van Cuylenburg is the founder of The Resilience Project, which provides mental health strategies to schools, sports clubs and businesses to help children and adults become happier and more resilient. The Imperfects features conversations with people who share their struggles and imperfections, with the aim of helping listeners to reflect on their own imperfect lives.

I listened to last month's episode of The Imperfects with Dr. Billy Garvey, a developmental and behavioural paediatrician. The interview focuses on "masculinity, role modelling and teaching emotional regulation to kids, especially young boys." I found Garvey's parenting advice both helpful and inspiring. However, what I was most struck by was Garvey's recounting of his mum's last words.

He begins his story by describing the day he received his medical school acceptance letter and his excitement to share the news with his mom. "Literally from that day," says Garvey, "she told everyone in the community that I was a doctor." He jokes that he hadn't even done his first day of medical school and so had to keep clarifying to people that he wasn't yet a doctor. "But she was so proud," he states.

Then, during his first year of medical school, his mom called him to say that she had a terminal brain tumour and had been given 18 months to live. "She somehow survived right to the end of med school," he says. But then—towards the end of his medical education—he got a phone call from his brother: their mom's doctors said, "You need to come now."

He jumped on a plane and when he landed, he called his brother to say that he had arrived and would be at the hospital in 45 minutes. His brother didn't tell him that their mother had already passed, but Garvey sensed it.

He explains that his aunts had traveled from Ireland to Australia to be with their sister. Knowing that Garvey wouldn't make it in time, one of his aunt's said to his mom, "You must be so proud of him because he's going to be a doctor." The aunt would later tell Garvey that his mom had replied: "I'm so proud of him because he's a good person."

Garvey seems to have taken great meaning from his mom's last words. He tells the hosts of The Imperfects that he puts effort into being a good person every single day and fails at it almost every single day. "But those are the north stars we should have for ourselves and our kids," he insists. He commends the hosts for being vulnerable and sharing stories of vulnerability. "How do we tell those stories and be genuinely vulnerable," he asks "and, like, lift kids into that direction and guide them there and say it's OK to fail, it's OK to cry, it's OK to have those big emotions, especially boys?"

Garvey's story reminded me of a question put to me by a young woman who took part in the Terry Fox Run in Wrexham. After having asked Shane about his life and career, she turned to me and said, "You must be so proud of him." I confirmed that I was, especially knowing how hard Shane has worked to get to where he is today. But if I had heard the podcast episode with Billy Garvey before that exchange, I might have added, "I'm proud of him because he's a good person."

I recommend the entirety of Garvey's 2024 interview on The Imperfects as well as his 2021 appearance on the podcast.