[2021-03-27] Special power
Today's piece is a heartfelt thank you for all the love and affection you shared with me in response to yesterday's post, Blue sky.
Some of you recognized that yesterday's post was me at my most vulnerable. One person wrote to me, "I think this is the most courageous post you have written." I agree. It's much harder for me—typically upbeat and unflappable—to admit that I'm struggling with emotional pain than to show my bald head or to talk about physical aches. My friend went on to say: "Admitting feeling disheartened and a bit discouraged is not a sign of weakness; it is a sign of great strength; strength in recognizing that sometimes, we need to lean on others and draw from their own special powers—yes, we all have at least one."
This reminded me of one of the best exchanges in The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse:
"What is the bravest thing you've ever said?" asked the boy.
"Help," said the horse.
I don't know that I was asking for help as much as authentically revealing how I was feeling, but you helped nevertheless, and I'm grateful for it. Many of you used your special powers to reach out and say or do something uplifting. You shared quotes ("Worrying is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do, but never gets you anywhere. "), jokes, videos, photos, songs, virtual hugs and laughter, reassurance ("one step in front of the other my friend"), stories of your own ups and downs ("you were not alone in feeling down"), signs of spring, resolutions to make changes based on my example, permission to have bad days, compliments, encouragement ("the marbles you still have in the jar are the important ones"), offers to talk, thanks, acknowledgement ("Crap days suck. But they help us appreciate great days."), positive thoughts, inspiration ("Rest today and be ready to be divine."), shared optimism ("We will live in the sun again."), wishes and blessings. Every message was a little cheer as I slowly climbed out of a dark hole.
Among the many people with special powers to make me feel better is my daughter. Whether we're walking, baking, doing dishes or listening to music, I love spending time with Melanie. She's so genuine and interesting. Today, we baked Miniature Cadbury Egg Chocolate Chip Cookie Bars. After our baking was done and the dishes washed and put away, we started talking music. I shared the Jenesis playlist and explained how it keeps growing as readers tell me about songs that are meaningful to them. Mel suggested a great tune: a live version of You Are My Friend by Sylvester and his amazing back-up vocalists: Martha and Izora. More moving than the Patti Labelle original, this song was perfect for today. Among the original lyrics are these:
You are my friend
I never knew it 'til then
My friend, my friend
You hold my hand
You might not say a word
But I see your tears when I show my pain...
I feel your love
When you're not near
It helps me make it knowing you care
The thought of you helps me carry on
When I feel all hope is gone
I see the world with brand new eyes
Your love has made me realize
My future looks bright to me,
Oh because you are my friend
Yesterday, I revealed my pain; last night and today, you showed you cared. That has helped me to carry on. While yesterday my feelings of hope had ebbed, today I saw the world with brand new eyes. Your love and friendship have made me realize that my future is bright—as bright as I choose to imagine it to be.
Another group of people with superpowers is a whole family who has adopted me. They have sent me gifts and cards and encouragement throughout my treatment. They're a Fabulous Four of super heroes. Today, the entire family drove to my house to drop off an early Easter present: a basket of hand-painted eggs, a basket of chocolates, and the most wonderful card: "Easter is a wonderful time to count our many blessings ... hope and happiness, joy and laughter ... and special people like you!" It was a coincidence that my daughter and I had baked our Easter-themed bars just before my friend texted me, so we were able to provide a reciprocal surprise.
As I completed my climb out of the hole, I saw a blue sky.
As my friend wrote this morning, we all have at least one special power. Recognize yours. Use it. Trust that you are making a difference.
