[2022-08-07] Best part of your day
On this day two years ago (August 7, 2020), I wrote a blog post on Gratitude. In it, I shared the wisdom of asking yourself each day: "Three things you're grateful for?" This question often elicits a general response and perhaps carries with it a slight pressure to come up with something grand, such as a loving partner, healthy children, a good job.
Today, I share a different question, suggested by my daughter in a recent conversation: "The best part of your day?" This question may engender a very different response, a reflection on this specific day and the moment—big or small—that was the best. That moment could be watching a monarch butterfly flitting between flowers, sleeping in, or having a kindness offered to you. It could be coming up with a solution to a problem at work, having a conversation with a neighbour over the fence, or chatting with an old friend. It could be making a new recipe with your daughter, collaborating with your spouse to help out your son, or receiving thanks from your son for the assistance.
Thinking about the best part of your day provides insights into what's important to you. Maybe it's not the big party but rather the moment of solitude when you sink your hands into a sink full of hot, sudsy water to begin the process of washing up. Maybe it's not the fancy meal you had with friends but rather the bowl of salty, buttery popcorn you had on the couch while reading a good book. Maybe it's not the presentations at the big conference but rather the one-on-one discussion with a like-minded attendee during the coffee break.
Whatever it is that you define as the best part of your day—being with others or being alone, being energetic or being tranquil, vacationing or staycationing—can tell you a lot about yourself and your priorities. So often, we fill our lives with shoulds. "My neighbour's backyard is so much better than mine; I should do more with my garden." "My colleague just got a promotion; I should do something to advance my career." "My brother-in-law drinks fancy wine; I should drink fancy wine." But you get to decide what you value most. There are no right or wrong answers, just answers that are more right for you regardless of what others might think.
When my daughter shared her question, I mentioned that it reminded me of an exercise called appreciative inquiry, which I had participated in years ago at work. To the best of my recollection, participants were asked this question: "The best day of your career?" It elicited a wide variety of responses, such as solving a problem with teammates, coming up with the answer to a tricky issue through diligent research on one's own, leading a group in making a successful pitch to senior management. We were next invited to reflect on our answer to analyze the characteristics of that best day—working with colleagues, working alone, leading others. It was a helpful way to figure out the kind of work that would best suit our personalities.
Melanie's question also reminded me of my accomplishments log. Every day, I write down what I accomplished that day. Today's list includes changing the batteries in the smoke detectors located in the basement and garage (our other smoke detectors are hard-wired or have long-lasting batteries). This task had been on my to-do list for a few weeks; I finally got around to it because the smoke detector in the basement started beeping intermittently to let me know that the battery was getting low. Changing the batteries in my smoke detectors may not sound like much of an accomplishment, but it is to me, especially because it had taken me a while to get around to it.
The point is that you get to decide what's the best part of your day, what's important to you, what you want from your life and career, and what you view as an accomplishment. Pay attention to your answers and try to bring more of what creates joy into your life.
