[2023-01-14] Saturday Synopsis #26
This week's Saturday Synopsis pays tribute to January and winter.
The month of January
From Timeanddate.com:
January is the first month in the Gregorian calendar and has 31 days. The name January comes from Janus or Ianus, the Roman god of passage and new beginnings. Iānus is Latin and means arched gateway.
From the Farmer's Almanac:
January was named for the Roman god Janus, known as the protector of gates and doorways who symbolize beginnings and endings. Janus is depicted with two faces, one looking into the past, the other with the ability to see into the future. What a fitting symbol for this first day of the year; this month is our door into the new year.
The Bell of Hope
I experienced my own ending and beginning as I rang the Bell of Hope exactly two years ago today to signal the completion of chemotherapy for ovarian cancer. On January 14, 2021, I wrote:
Today, I rang that bell to signify the end of my chemotherapy treatments, and the beginning of hope that these interventions have slayed my cancer.
As my daughter pointed out, this is the end of one step in my treatment, and while there are more steps to come, this is a significant one. Another person likened it to having climbed a mountain.
On that same day in January 2021, I received news that my CA125 was at 10. A month later, it would drop to 8. My CA125 has remained at 8 or 7 ever since—low and steady.
The Bell of Hope revisited
Though I have, thankfully, escaped any further chemotherapy for ovarian cancer, I did require radiation therapy for perianal skin cancer. Beginning on January 5, 2022, I underwent 25 rounds of radiation therapy, after which point I rang another Bell of Hope. On February 8, 2022, I wrote:
After my treatment, I went to the front desk of the radiation therapy unit where they keep the bell. Nurse Hilary came out to greet me, as she often does. I asked her whether she would join me in my photo, as I wasn't sure of the protocol. She agreed without hesitation, suggesting that we stand beneath the Radiation Therapy sign. In the photo, you can see my huge smile even though I'm wearing a mask: it's evident in my eyes. You can also see the happiness in Hilary's thumbs-up.
After we took the photo, Hilary asked whether I was actually going to ring the bell, as I had simply been holding it. So I gave it a cheerful ring. Hilary and the receptionist applauded, as did the patients and visitors who were seated in the waiting area. It brought tears to my eyes. "I didn't think I would get emotional," I said to Hilary. But I did, and she understood.
Enjoy the winter
On December 8, 2021, I reflected on the importance of enjoying life even in the midst of winter or cancer treatment:
After a long and mostly lovely fall, winter appears to have settled in. On some days, I will no doubt be like the reluctant house cat who sticks its nose out the door, shakes its head at the cold, wet weather, and retreats to its bed in front of the fireplace. If the weather is horrible, I won't venture forth, unless I absolutely have to—such is the privilege of being retired.
Of course, I couldn't spend the entire winter holed up in my house. I'm not down with hibernating. That would be giving up, like postponing living until the spring. No, I believe in embracing the beauty of every season.
I find this analogy applicable to dealing with cancer (or any long-term challenge, including coping with a pandemic). Just as we don't stop enjoying life in the winter, we mustn't stop enjoying life during cancer treatment. Just as we can find contentment despite the ice, snow, windchill and freezing rain, we can find joy despite the surgery, chemotherapy, radiation, physiotherapy, and other medical interventions—in the moment, not months down the road when we've completed treatment.
The time for comfort
From British poet Edith Sitwell:
Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home.
Even your coldest winter
From Australian poet Erin Hanson:
Life is unpredictable,
It changes with the seasons,
Even your coldest winter
Happens for the best of reasons,
And though it feels eternal,
Like all you'll ever do is freeze,
I promise spring is coming,
And with it, brand new leaves
