[2023-06-14] A day of gifts

Since publishing last night's post (Breast surgery update), I have been blessed with a plethora of gifts.

First, many people sent emails or left comments on my social media posts, reinforcing that I was making the right decision.
  • They offered virtual hugs, support and votes in favour of seizing the opportunity—for my benefit and that of my family.
  • They acknowledged that "It's never a good time to... have kids, have surgery, move house etc... life will always get in the way, as you say" and supported my decision to "take the date."
  • They expressed confidence in my ability to make a decision that is right for me.
  • They appreciated the reflection, vulnerability and clear reasoning I shared in the post.
  • They shared their own stories of having made similar choices—choices that ultimately gave them peace of mind.
  • They described this surgery as "another step in living BEYOND your ovarian cancer."
  • They noted how nice it was to be having this surgery the day after my birthday, even suggesting that good things seem to happen around that time.
  • They reminded me that where it counts, I "won't change a whit."
  • They referenced the "army of supporters" that are behind me.
I replied to several commenters to say that every vote in favour of getting on with the surgery was a great comfort to me.

One dear friend offered to host me for lunch before my surgery, even though she is dealing with her own health issues. She also shared that her sister had made the same choice as I am making, and gained much peace of mind in the process.

Another woman, who is—herself—in the midst of treatment for breast cancer, offered to lend me a wedge pillow to help with sleeping after surgery and a shirt to wear until the surgical drains are removed. I happily accepted. She helped me in another way too, perhaps without realizing it. In describing her own experience with breast cancer, she solidified in my mind that preventive surgery is absolutely the right thing to do.

A man who recently underwent surgery to deal with cancer sent a heartwarming message: "When I got my diagnosis I found waiting for info/dates the hardest part…the mind can spin and spin! Hopefully after the surgery you’ll be able to take a big breath of relief and have even more certainty that cancer and the potential of cancer are a thing of the past." I can only hope. Other cancer survivors wrote to say they were thinking of me, adding "You’ve got this my friend" and "I’m so happy this significantly reduces your chance of breast cancer."

Finally (unrelated to my prophylactic bilateral mastectomy), a woman I used to work with gave me the gift of her time today. In response to my post on learning Brazilian Portuguese (300 days of learning), she offered to help me practise speaking the language. I immediately replied that I would love that. She shared her availability, and I picked a date next Wednesday. However, seeing as it was Wednesday today, I suggested that if she were available, we could have a quick chat to get to know each other. To my utter delight, she accepted, calling me right away. She told me about her background, which included having been born in Brazil and having taught English to Brazilians for many years. It showed. She was a natural teacher, speaking slowly and clearly, quickly providing vocabulary I was struggling to find, encouraging me to continue speaking in Portuguese, sharing interesting tidbits about her country and culture, and being very responsive with follow-ups. After our call, she sent me additional information that she had promised to pass along and told me that I should feel free to reach out any time, as she loves helping people with matters pertaining to Brazil. I responded: "You have such a wonderful way of teaching, correcting, validating, informing, entertaining. As I said on our call, you are a gift."

And that's how my entire day has felt, like a gift—indeed, a whole day of gifts. Even before the surgery, your support is giving me peace of mind.