In doing research for an upcoming conversation with an employee who is feeling disrespected at work, I came across a Café Jen post about how to deal with feelings of being unappreciated at work. While it may not reflect the challenge my friend is facing, I thought it would be useful to share this content with Jenesis readers.

In researching this topic in 2015, when I wrote the Café Jen post, and again today for this update in Jenesis, I found advice for what to do if you’re feeling unappreciated at work, including shifting what you think and changing how you act.

If you’re feeling unappreciated at work, you might benefit from a change in perspective.

In 4 things to do when you feel unappreciated, Dan Rockwell of the Leadership Freak blog argues that "Gratitude is limited to first accomplishments. After that, success is expected." If you exceed your boss’ expectations by doing something they didn’t know you could do, they're likely to praise you. But once they know how great you are at a particular task, they may see that as the new normal.

That could lead to your getting more work, not more praise, which could leave you feeling even more under-valued. But here, too, you can choose to view that situation in a positive light. CEO and blogger Skipp Richard writes in 4 ways to get appreciated at work: "More work may equal appreciation. Your boss may be recognizing your good work by giving you more work. He may not be expressing it in the way that you want to hear it, but for some people this is how it works. More work = great job!"

It’s hard not to take a lack of praise personally. But it may help to consider that your boss may be limited in how much praise they dole out for reasons that have little to do with you: they don't have the time to keep track of everything on your plate and therefore don't realize the work you are doing, they're overworked and overwhelmed themselves, or they aren't skilled at recognizing others.

These same reasons are probably at play when colleagues don’t show appreciation for each other’s contributions. Your coworker may not know how hard you worked on a project, or may be too busy themselves to notice, or may feel shy about giving compliments. Indeed, as I wrote in Compliments and kudos, "we underplay the positive impact that a compliment could have on someone else, we overplay how awkward the recipient will feel, and we lack confidence in our ability to deliver a well-worded, warm expression of appreciation."

Among the various tips I found for coping with a lack of appreciation at work, these were my favourites.

Love what you do. In Do You Feel Underappreciated at Work? Try These Suggestions, executive coach Patricia Fripp says that enthusiasm is infectious. She quotes Luke Filose, a marketing and engagement manager: "If you don’t appreciate your own work, if you’re not passionate about it, why would you expect to make an impression on others and have others recognize you and appreciate you?" If you’re excited about your achievements, others are more likely to be enthusiastic as well.

Make your contributions known. Sydney of the Untemplater blog writes in 15 Solutions If You’re Feeling Unappreciated At Work: "If your managers and colleagues have no idea what you’re doing all day, how do you expect them to look up to you or acknowledge you for any of your hard work, ideas, and contributions? Make sure your boss actually knows what you’re working on." You can do this by emailing your boss brief project updates, or creating short documents capturing lessons learned at the end of a project. You will be providing valuable information to your boss and, in the process, giving them a better sense of your contributions.

Become more visible. In a similar vein, Forbes contributor Caroline Castrillon writes in 10 Things To Do When You Feel Undervalued At Work that employees who are feeling unappreciated should increase their visibility. She says, "Start asking for high-profile assignments that greatly impact your organization’s bottom line. Speak up more in meetings and volunteer to represent your team at cross-functional events or conferences." In addition to gaining new skills, you may have an opportunity to demonstrate your abilities in a new area. And, as noted above, doing something new and unexpected is more likely to lead to praise than doing what you're already doing—no matter how well.

Appreciate others. Just about every article I read while researching this post advised readers to set an example for others by showing appreciation. Business leaders and authors Josh Baron and Rob Lachenauer state in If you're feeling unappreciated, give someone else credit: "It’s a fundamental human need to feel valued by people we esteem." So give what you want to get.

Show appreciation for your boss. Skipp Richard points out in 4 ways to get appreciated at work: "Your boss is also a person. Maybe he doesn’t feel you appreciate him. Don’t think a position or title makes him immune. The appreciation need doesn’t disappear with a promotion." Furthermore, complimenting your boss first may start a trend.

Start a mutual admiration society. Life coach and web TV host Marie Forleo suggests in her video Feeling Underappreciated? Here’s What To Do About It that you start what she calls a praise posse. With as few as two people (you and a friend) you can start a mutual admiration society. Instead of complaining about work and what you’re not getting, share your accomplishments and let the compliments flow.

Keep a kudos file. One of the easiest ways to deal with a lack of appreciation is to remind yourself of past compliments you’ve received from bosses, colleagues and clients. Career expert Vicki Salemi suggests in How to get positive feedback from a boss who doesn't give it that you "Create a folder in Outlook to store complimentary emails you get from your boss, peers and customers." She also recommends that you keep note of compliments you receive verbally. "This file should be your go-to on those days when your confidence flags," writes Salemi. You'll find more ideas on this topic in my recent Jenesis post Keeping the kudos.

Document your accomplishments. Similarly, Caroline Castrillon advises in 10 Things To Do When You Feel Undervalued At Work that you take responsibility for tracking your accomplishments, which will help you prepare for discussions with your boss, especially at appraisal time. It will also make it easier for you to update your CV, especially if you get to a point where you contemplate leaving your job because of a lack of recognition.

We’ve all experienced feelings of insecurity and frustration when we think the praise we deserve is not forthcoming. And this doesn't end when we leave the workforce. One can feel unappreciated in retirement as well as in all sorts of settings, such as in our families, communities and volunteer organizations.

To counter such emotions, I try to focus on intrinsic motivation—doing something because I enjoy the activity—and acknowledging my own efforts, such as through my daily accomplishments log. As Caroline Castrillon says in 10 Things To Do When You Feel Undervalued At Work, "While feeling valued is great, you can't expect your motivation to always come from external sources. Effective self-motivation is one of the things that sets high achievers apart from other employees. So, try to reflect on your wins, even the small ones."